Minggu, 18 April 2010

CNT8

Tell me, Jaejoong shhi, mind if we have a talk ? Katakan padaku, Jaejoong shhi, keberatan kalau kita bicara?


I stared at Yunho. Aku menatap Yunho. I couldn't do anything else. Aku tidak bisa melakukan hal lain. Desperately wishing for my mouth to move, or even my head to nod, but it just didn't. Sangat berharap untuk mulut untuk bergerak, atau bahkan kepalaku mengangguk, tetapi hanya tidak. It was not just shock, it was fear, yes, fear, and it was far worst. Bukan hanya shock, itu takut, ya, ketakutan, dan itu jauh terburuk. He wished to talk, I wished to run away. Dia ingin bicara, aku ingin melarikan diri.
I still could not do anything, and I cursed at myself. Aku masih tidak bisa berbuat apa-apa, dan aku mengutuk diri sendiri. How the hell only a couple of words could freeze me like that ? Bagaimana neraka hanya beberapa kata bisa membekukan saya seperti itu? But I knew the answer even if it brought shame on me. Tapi aku tahu jawabannya bahkan jika itu membawa malu pada saya.
I maybe was a coward after all, always running away, always trying to avoid discussions about special points, always hiding my feelings. Saya mungkin adalah seorang pengecut setelah semua, selalu melarikan diri, selalu berusaha untuk menghindari diskusi tentang poin khusus, selalu menyembunyikan perasaan saya.

Maybe, if only I would have acted differently, maybe we both would never have been in that situation. Barangkali, kalau saja aku akan bertindak berbeda, mungkin kita berdua tidak akan pernah berada dalam situasi itu. Maybe, we would never have gone that far, maybe we could still have remained simple friends...I smirked at that thought, who was I kidding ? I could never see him as just a friend. Mungkin, kita tidak akan pernah pergi sejauh itu, mungkin kita masih bisa tetap berteman sederhana ... aku melecehkan berpikir bahwa, siapakah aku bercanda? Aku tidak pernah bisa melihatnya hanya sebagai teman. At this instant, my feelings felt heavier than never, I felt like I carried a weight on my shoulders, and I hated it, I hated how my love for him turned bitterly exhausting. Pada saat ini, perasaan saya merasa lebih berat daripada tidak, aku merasa berat membawa di bahu saya, dan saya membencinya, aku benci bagaimana cinta saya untuk dia berbalik getir melelahkan.

Even if I've always felt somewhat shameful about those feelings...Even if sometimes I hated that love, I knew of its purity and truth, and I hated how I saw it now only as a burden. Bahkan jika saya selalu merasa agak memalukan tentang perasaan ... Bahkan jika kadang-kadang aku benci cinta, aku tahu kemurnian dan kebenaran, dan saya benci bagaimana aku melihatnya sekarang hanya sebagai beban.
Was it my lack of sincerity which brought me to this point ? Apakah saya kurang ketulusan yang membawa saya ke titik ini? My cowardness ? Saya cowardness? Whatever it was, now, I fell too deep in it, now, I had to be strong, I had to get a grip of myself, I had to be courageous. Apa pun itu, sekarang, aku jatuh terlalu dalam di dalamnya, sekarang, aku harus kuat, aku harus menguasai diriku, aku harus berani.

“What is it Yunho ?” My mouth functioned by itself, as if pushed by my sudden realisation. "Apa itu Yunho" mulut saya berfungsi dengan sendirinya, seolah-olah didorong oleh realisasi mendadak saya?. Now it seemed like my body was acting by itself once again, just like that night when I followed him in his room. Sekarang sepertinya tubuhku bertindak dengan sendirinya sekali lagi, seperti pada malam itu ketika aku mengikutinya di kamarnya. I walked beside him on the corridor, vaguely wondering what in this man could make me lose control like that. Aku berjalan di samping dia di koridor, samar-samar bertanya-tanya apa pada orang ini bisa membuat saya kehilangan kontrol seperti itu. There was a strange impression of déjà vue lingering in the air. Ada kesan aneh Déjà Vue berlama-lama di udara.

“I think we've gotten far enough from the classroom now Yunho” "Saya pikir kami telah mendapat cukup jauh dari kelas sekarang Yunho"

“I think too” "Saya berpikir terlalu"

“So, what is this that you want to say ?” "Jadi, apa ini yang ingin Anda katakan?"

He was quiet for a moment, his eyes set on mines. Dia diam sejenak, matanya set pada tambang. but I didn't look away. tapi aku tidak berpaling. I knew I couldn't. Aku tahu aku tidak bisa.
So, I kept to stare at him, counting each seconds passing by. Jadi, aku terus memandanginya, menghitung setiap detik lewat. His eyes were too black, I couldn't see anything. Matanya juga hitam, aku tidak bisa melihat apa-apa. And I shamefully felt under his insistant stare my resolutions flinching. Dan aku merasa di bawah tatapan memalukan insistant nya resolusi saya mengernyit. My body was strangely trembling, my heart beating faster and faster hurt my chest, my throat seemed to be burdened now. Tubuhku gemetar anehnya, hati saya berdetak lebih cepat dan lebih cepat sakit dada, tenggorokan saya tampaknya terbebani sekarang.
I felt the fear reappearing in me viciously. Aku merasa ketakutan muncul kembali dalam diriku kejam. Slowly he placed his hand on my shoulders and I swallowed difficultly. Perlahan ia meletakkan tangannya di pundak saya dan saya menelan difficultly. I wouldn't have been able to tell why but I could just have broken down here before him, only his hand, his eyes, set a chaos inside me, and I hated me for that, for being that weak. Aku tidak akan bisa mengatakan mengapa tapi aku hanya bisa rusak di sini sebelum dia, hanya tangannya, matanya, menetapkan kekacauan dalam diriku, dan aku membenci diriku untuk itu, karena yang lemah.

“Tell me Jaejoong how are you doing ?” And then, I laughed, I laughed so hard so hard . "Katakan Jaejoong apa kabar Dan?" Itu, aku tertawa, aku tertawa begitu keras begitu keras. Even if it was not a laugh of happiness, even if I laughed at the irony and the ridicule of his question, it felt good, it felt so good. Bahkan kalau bukan tawa kebahagiaan, bahkan jika saya tertawa di ironi dan ejekan dari pertanyaannya, rasanya enak, rasanya begitu baik.
I laughed so hard that I could feel tears slightly verging at the corner of my eyes, and it made me laugh even more. Aku tertawa begitu keras sehingga aku bisa merasakan sedikit verging air mata di sudut mata saya, dan itu membuatku tertawa bahkan lebih. It seemed that I had found a way, something to get rid of all my stress all my saddeness, all my shame, disgust and angriness. Sepertinya aku telah menemukan cara, sesuatu untuk membuang semua stres saya semua saddeness saya, semua saya malu, jijik dan angriness. And different from crying in addition, that day had to be blessed. Dan berbeda dari menangis di samping itu, hari itu harus diberkati.

I could still see the dumbstruck look of Yunho through my half closed eyes, but strangely I did not care, it was a good feeling. Aku masih bisa melihat tampilan dari Yunho kaget setengah saya melalui memejamkan mata, tapi anehnya aku tidak peduli, itu adalah perasaan yang baik. I could express in a way that only me understood all my sorrow and that in front of the very man which caused it, how jubilant that was ? Aku bisa mengungkapkan dengan cara yang hanya aku mengerti semua kesedihan saya dan yang di depan orang yang sangat yang menyebabkan, bagaimana gembira itu? But then, the sound fainted and the only remainder of that act were the slight spams of my body and a weird smirk on my face. Tapi kemudian, suara pingsan dan hanya sisa dari tindakan yang merupakan spam sedikit tubuhku dan seringai aneh di wajahku.

“I am doing as fine as anyone could be in my situation” I was sure that Yunho was not going to understand, and how could he anyway ? "Saya melakukan yang baik sebagai orang bisa dalam situasi saya" Saya yakin bahwa Yunho tidak akan mengerti, dan bagaimana ia bisa sih? But, I felt nonetheless slightly disappointed as he answered. Tapi, saya tetap merasa sedikit kecewa karena dia menjawab.

“I see...Well, yeah it must be great being in love right ?” you have no idea “And being loved back, I guess you can't feel anything else than great right ?” His eyes weren't set on me anymore and I was grateful, if he saw me now, if he looked at my face now, at my eyes, he would have maybe understood. "Aku melihat ... Well, yeah itu harus besar berada di kanan cinta kembali?" Anda tidak tahu "Dan dicintai, saya rasa Anda tidak bisa merasakan hal lain daripada yang benar hebat? Nya" mata tidak diatur saya lagi dan saya bersyukur, jika dia melihat saya sekarang, jika ia menatap wajah saya sekarang, di mata saya, dia akan mungkin mengerti.

“Yeah, so, you brought me here to just ask me how I was doing ? "Yeah, jadi, Anda membawa saya ke sini hanya bertanya bagaimana saya lakukan? Well now that I answered, I can go back right ?” Nah sekarang aku jawab, aku bisa kembali kan? "

“No, actually, Jaejoong you know...I was thinking of it ” "Tidak, sebenarnya, Jaejoong kau tahu ... aku memikirkan hal itu"

it . itu. I closed my eyes. it I knew too well what it was, and what was up to come. Aku memejamkan mata,. Itu aku tahu terlalu baik apa itu dan apa yang sampai datang. I had been waiting for it while hoping truthfully that it would not happen. Aku telah menunggu sambil berharap jujur bahwa tidak akan terjadi. Talking on the phone about this had been so difficult, I knew that the fear I felt and which was strong enough to keep me from moving was the fright to have to face him, and to talk about those memories with him. Berbicara di telepon tentang ini begitu sulit, aku tahu bahwa ketakutan yang saya merasa dan yang kuat agar aku tidak bergerak adalah ketakutan harus menghadapinya, dan berbicara tentang kenangan-kenangan bersamanya.
And now I was trapped once again, trapped like this time, and again, I felt nude and ready to suffocate. Dan sekarang aku terjebak sekali lagi, terjebak seperti saat ini, dan sekali lagi, saya merasa telanjang dan siap untuk mencekik.

“...You have” "... Anda telah"

“Yes, I was wondering how Yoochun would take it, if he was to know” "Ya, aku bertanya-tanya bagaimana Yoochun mau mengambilnya, jika dia tahu"

“Well he's not, is he ?” "Yah dia tidak, dia?"

“No he's not, I was just wondering” "Tidak dia tidak, aku hanya ingin tahu"

“...Jung Yunho, what are you implying ? "... Jung Yunho, apa maksudmu? You want to tell him everything ?” Anda ingin memberitahu dia segalanya? "

“Of course not, I was just thinking” "Tentu saja tidak, aku hanya berpikir"

“Just thinking ? "Hanya berpikir? Well I am not in his head I can't give you an answer” Yah saya tidak di kepala, aku tidak bisa memberikan jawaban "

“...Right, but, you, how do you feel about it ? "... Benar, tetapi, Anda, bagaimana Anda merasa tentang hal itu? Isn't it going to be weird when you two will have sex ?” Apakah tidak akan aneh ketika kalian berdua akan melakukan seks? "

That time anger flashed into me and kept me from talking. Bahwa kemarahan berkelebat dalam waktu saya dan membuat saya tidak berbicara. Now, he was going overboard. Sekarang, dia akan ke laut. How...Just how could he talk that way ? Bagaimana ... Hanya bagaimana ia bisa berbicara seperti itu? What we did was so meaningless for him that he could call it up so easily. Apa yang kami lakukan adalah sangat berarti bagi dirinya bahwa ia bisa menyebutnya sampai begitu mudah. He knew my body so well that he could talk about it as a vulgar piece of meat that I was about to give to someone else ? Dia tahu tubuhku dengan baik sehingga ia bisa berbicara tentang hal itu sebagai sepotong daging yang vulgar saya akan memberikan kepada orang lain?

“I don't think Yunho, that what I might do with Yoochun, or what is going on between us is any of your business” "Saya tidak berpikir Yunho, bahwa apa yang saya bisa lakukan dengan Yoochun, atau apa yang terjadi di antara kita adalah salah satu bisnis Anda"

“You're right, it's not. "Kau benar, itu tidak. I was just afraid it could be a problem” Aku hanya takut itu bisa jadi masalah "

“So I guess you feel relieved now” It all came in a whisper, I wasn't waiting for an answer, I didn't want one, knowing already his words. "Jadi saya rasa Anda merasa lega sekarang" Semuanya datang berbisik, aku tidak menunggu jawaban, aku tidak mau, sudah mengetahui kata-katanya.

“Yes” "Ya"

Yes... Ya ...
So he was worried he could be a problem between Yoochun and me uh ? Jadi, dia khawatir ia bisa menjadi masalah antara Yoochun dan aku eh? I see, I see. Saya melihat, saya melihat.
So he cares that much about me, I should feel grateful, right ? Jadi dia peduli bahwa banyak tentang diriku, aku harus merasa bersyukur, kan?

“I guess there is no more to say, excuse me, I've just remembered I had something to do, see you soon” "Saya kira tidak ada lagi yang bisa dikatakan, maaf, aku baru ingat aku punya sesuatu untuk melakukannya, lihat Anda segera"

And I walked away, only realising at that instant that it was all I had wished for since we both went out of the classroom. Dan aku melangkah pergi, hanya menyadari pada saat itu bahwa itu semua saya berharap untuk karena kami berdua keluar dari kelas. It was funny how I could even less stand to be close to him, to talk to him, now that I was out of that situation comparing to when I still was. Lucu bagaimana aku bisa lebih sedikit berdiri berada dekat dengannya, berbicara dengannya, sekarang aku keluar dari membandingkan situasi ketika aku masih. It had become ridiculous and pathetic. Ini telah menjadi konyol dan menyedihkan. Haven't I done all those things to save our friendship ? Bukankah aku melakukan semua hal-hal untuk menyelamatkan persahabatan kami? And now that I had a chance to go back to the old times I acted even more weirdly beside him. Dan sekarang saya punya kesempatan untuk kembali ke masa lalu aku bertindak lebih ganjil di sampingnya.

But back to normal...Was imposible. Tapi kembali normal ... Apakah kasuistik. Were feelings fading with time ? fading dengan waktu Apakah perasaan? Were memories becoming blurry ? Apakah kenangan menjadi kabur? I didn't know. Aku tidak tahu. And if they actually did, how much time was needed ? Dan jika mereka benar-benar melakukan, berapa lama waktu yang dibutuhkan? I would have done anything to know, anything . Saya akan melakukan apa saja untuk tahu, apa-apa. Right now was the worst. Saat ini adalah yang terburuk. I hated myself to still love him, but I didn't hate that love, I hated how I was hypocritical, thruthfully, just the very thought to try to erase those feelings from my heart scared me, with times it had become a part of me, he became a part of me, even if he did not know it. Aku benci diriku masih mencintainya, tapi aku tidak benci cinta itu, aku benci bagaimana aku munafik, thruthfully, hanya memikirkan untuk mencoba menghapus perasaan-perasaan dari hati saya takut saya, dengan waktu itu telah menjadi bagian dari saya, ia menjadi bagian dari diriku, bahkan jika ia tidak tahu.

And I hated those memories that constantly came back, torturing me tiredlessly. Dan aku benci kenangan yang selalu kembali, menyiksaku tiredlessly. Just looking at his eyes was enough to recall me something, and I couldn't bear it anymore, when he touched me so casually, it all reminded me of before. Hanya dengan melihat matanya sudah cukup untuk mengingat sesuatu, dan aku tidak tahan lagi, ketika dia menyentuh saya begitu saja, itu semua mengingatkan saya sebelumnya. I hated the fact that he was consantly in my head, that the most ridiculous thing was reminding me of him, that he appeared in my mind as naturally as breathing. Aku benci kenyataan bahwa ia consantly di kepala saya, bahwa hal yang paling konyol itu mengingatkan aku tentang dia, bahwa ia muncul dalam pikiran saya secara alami seperti bernapas. I hated the fact to have realised just how deep I had fallen...For him. Aku benci fakta telah menyadari betapa dalam aku telah jatuh ... Untuk dia.

What was to say, was that I didn't realise it. Apa yang mengatakan, bahwa aku tidak menyadarinya. It all happened sneakily, without a word witout a sound, he became all I thought about, all I desired. Semua itu terjadi sneakily, tanpa kata witout suara, dia menjadi semua aku memikirkan, aku diinginkan. Maybe, after years I would have been be able to forget him, to give up, if we hadn't crossed that line that is. Mungkin, setelah bertahun-tahun aku akan dapat melupakannya, untuk menyerah, jika kita tak pernah terlintas bahwa garis yang. Why should I be the only one to be blamed ? Mengapa saya harus menjadi satu-satunya yang disalahkan? He crossed that line too, after all he was the one who proposed it, he was the one who forced me. But, he didn't feel what you felt . Dia melewati batas itu juga, setelah semua dialah yang diusulkan itu, dialah yang memaksa saya merasa. Tapi, ia tidak merasakan apa yang Anda. This I knew it too well. Ini aku tahu itu terlalu baik.

I rushed to the toilets, opening the faucet and splashed some cold water violently on my face, I was really going to go crazy. Aku bergegas ke toilet, membuka keran dan memercikkan air dingin keras di wajah saya, saya benar-benar akan gila.




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Yunho watched Jaejoong's back as he walked away. Jaejoong Yunho melihat kembali saat dia berjalan pergi. He had the feeling he didn't say all he wanted to say, but if you asked him what more now, he surely wouldn't be able to tell you exactly what. Dia merasa dia tidak mengatakan semua yang ingin dikatakannya, tetapi jika Anda bertanya padanya apa lagi sekarang, ia pasti tidak akan bisa mengatakan dengan tepat apa. It was just a feeling, something simple and simply bugging. Itu hanya perasaan, sesuatu yang sederhana dan cukup mengganggu. He had that feeling that he should have asked something else, he should have asked more . Dia punya perasaan bahwa dia seharusnya bertanya sesuatu yang lain, seharusnya dia tanya lagi. That talk was supposed to relieve him from all of his tension, at least in his mind, but all it did was too blur things some more. Pembicaraan itu seharusnya membebaskan dirinya dari semua ketegangannya, setidaknya dalam pikirannya, namun semua itu terlalu kabur hal lagi.

His eyes could not stop to trace Jaejoong's back until it grew out of sight. Matanya tidak bisa berhenti untuk menelusuri Jaejoong's sampai tumbuh dari pandangan.
Damn it, that conversation just now had been pointless Sialan, bahwa percakapan sekarang telah sia-sia
He had not said what he wanted, he had not been far enough, he still had that uncomfortable feeling just inside of him, sticky. Dia tidak mengatakan apa yang ia inginkan, ia tidak cukup jauh, ia masih memiliki perasaan yang tidak nyaman hanya dalam dirinya, lengket. He still felt as he wanted to ask him something, it just didn't feel right, how everything could just end like that ? Dia masih merasa seperti dia ingin menanyakan sesuatu, ia hanya tidak merasa benar, bagaimana semuanya bisa berakhir seperti itu? With that only phone call ? Dengan panggilan telepon saja?

Yunho couldn't lie about that. Yunho tidak bisa berbohong tentang hal itu. He didn't feel ready to let Jaejong go, he didn't feel ready to put an end to their 'activity', when he looked at him nothing had changed he still wanted the same thing. Dia tidak merasa siap untuk membiarkan Jaejong pergi, ia tidak merasa siap untuk mengakhiri kegiatan mereka '", ketika ia menatapnya tidak ada yang berubah ia masih menginginkan hal yang sama. But again, now the problem was that Yoochun. Tetapi sekali lagi, sekarang masalahnya adalah bahwa Yoochun. Now, he didn't have any other choice he had to let go, to erase those thoughts, or at least contain them in his heart, he could never be again as he used to. Sekarang, dia tidak punya pilihan lain ia harus melepaskan, untuk menghapus pikiran-pikiran, atau paling tidak mengandung mereka dalam hatinya, ia tidak pernah bisa lagi seperti dulu.

And still, a part of him resisted. Dan masih, bagian dari dirinya menolak. Something in his body screamed that it wasn't fair and was dying to go against his own thoughts. Sesuatu dalam tubuhnya menjerit bahwa hal itu tidak adil dan sangat ingin pergi melawan pikirannya sendiri. Almost naturally he found himself scheming a plan to get Jaejoong in his room again, but just as he began, he cursed at himself. Hampir secara alami ia menemukan dirinya licik rencana untuk mendapatkan Jaejoong di kamarnya lagi, tetapi hanya saat ia mulai, ia mengutuk dirinya sendiri. Now that there was this other person he couldn't make a move, unfortunately even someone like him understood it. Sekarang ini ada orang lain yang tidak bisa bergerak, sayangnya bahkan seseorang seperti dia memahaminya.

Yeah, it surely was ridiculous that all thing. Ya, itu pasti adalah hal konyol semua. Why was he that touchy about that subject ? Mengapa dia yang sensitif tentang subjek itu? Why now was he so obsessed by it ? Mengapa sekarang dia begitu terobsesi dengan itu? Was it that he had gotten so used to that situation that he couldn't bear this little comfy and convenient situation to change ? Apakah karena ia telah terbiasa dengan situasi yang ia tak tahan ini sedikit nyaman dan situasi nyaman untuk berubah? Or was it that it had been a really long while since he last felt that sexually satisfied ? Atau itu benar-benar telah lama sejak ia terakhir merasa puas secara seksual? And that he hardly could imagine now having a better time in bed with somebody else ? Dan bahwa ia tak bisa membayangkan sekarang memiliki waktu yang lebih baik di tempat tidur dengan orang lain? He didn't know, he really didn't, but he just couldn't stand how that all situation was getting all the space in his head. Dia tidak tahu, dia benar-benar tidak, tapi ia tidak bisa berdiri bagaimana situasi semuanya mendapatkan semua ruang di kepalanya.

Yeah, Yunho was someone who hated to not obtain things he desired, and maybe that was why he always had what he wanted. Yeah, Yunho adalah seseorang yang membenci untuk tidak mendapatkan hal-hal yang diinginkan, dan mungkin itu sebabnya ia selalu memiliki apa yang diinginkannya. But, in this kind of situation, everyone would just give up, it was a lost battle, and even if he could get him again that was not going to be like before, so why should he spoil his time and energy in it ? Tapi, dalam situasi seperti ini, setiap orang hanya akan menyerah, itu adalah pertempuran hilang, dan bahkan jika ia bisa mendapatkan lagi yang tidak akan seperti sebelumnya, jadi mengapa ia merusak waktu dan energi di dalamnya?
No, there was no reasons he had to, except that in spite of him, that all story was constantly in his mind. Tidak, tidak ada alasan ia harus, kecuali bahwa meskipun dia, bahwa cerita semua selalu dalam pikirannya.

At that point, Yunho decided that he had to think of something else, he decided that he was only confused that he needed some time and that, especially, he needed to keep himself away from those two, to keep himself away from Jaejoong and Yoochun. Pada saat itu, Yunho memutuskan bahwa ia harus memikirkan sesuatu yang lain, dia memutuskan bahwa dia hanya bingung bahwa ia membutuhkan beberapa waktu dan itu, terutama, ia harus menjaga dirinya jauh dari kedua, untuk menjaga dirinya dari Jaejoong dan Yoochun .
Yunho started to walk again, yeah, if he did that everything was going to be alright. Yunho mulai berjalan lagi, ya, kalau dia melakukan itu semuanya akan baik-baik.

If only he could get himself to believe it. Kalau saja ia bisa mendapatkan dirinya untuk percaya.




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Junsu's feet were almost grating the floor as he walked on the too long corridor. kaki Junsu's hampir kisi lantai saat ia berjalan pada koridor terlalu lama. The truth was that he was ready and pretty decided to not go there, but Changmin forced him, and well, after what he did for him he didn't want to make him angry or disappointed, so he went, even if his all being was screaming to not. Kenyataannya adalah bahwa ia siap dan cantik memutuskan untuk tidak pergi ke sana, tapi Changmin memaksanya, dan baik, setelah apa yang dia lakukan untuk dirinya ia tidak ingin membuatnya marah atau kecewa, maka ia pergi, bahkan jika itu semua menjadi berteriak untuk tidak.

He stared at the door for a couple of seconds, his hands locked but not moving on the cold surface of the doorknob, he knew he was in there and he knew he was waiting for him. Ia menatap pintu selama beberapa detik, tangannya terkunci namun tidak bergerak pada permukaan dingin kenop pintu, dia tahu dia ada di sana dan ia tahu ia menunggunya. It was funny in a way how that only thought used to make him feel warm and made blossom a smile that he had never himself noticed on his face. Itu lucu dengan cara bagaimana yang hanya berpikir digunakan untuk membuatnya merasa hangat dan membuat mekar senyum bahwa ia tidak pernah dirinya melihat di wajahnya. When, now, his body remained the same and he was way too aware of the expression he was wearing on his face. Ketika, sekarang, tubuhnya tetap sama dan dia terlalu menyadari ekspresi dia mengenakan di wajahnya.

Junsu breathed, he had to be strong if it wasn't for him, he promised it to Changmin. JunSu menghela napas, ia harus kuat jika bukan karena dia, dia berjanji untuk Changmin. Softly, he opened the door and was greeted to a warm and wide smile, as always, Yoochun's one. Dengan lembut, ia membuka pintu dan disambut dengan senyum hangat dan lebar, seperti biasa, Yoochun satu. But that time, Junsu didn't smile back, he only nodded in acknowledgement and sat on the chair in front of him. Tapi waktu itu, Junsu tidak tersenyum kembali, ia hanya mengangguk pengakuan dan duduk di kursi di depannya. He didn't fail to notice Yoochun's slightly surprised eyes but didn't pay a lot of attention to them. Dia tidak gagal untuk melihat mata Yoochun's sedikit terkejut tapi tidak membayar banyak perhatian kepada mereka.

Junsu was not mad at Yoochun, nor was he mad at Jaejoong. Junsu tidak marah Yoochun, dia juga tidak marah Jaejoong. And to be truthful he wasn't even mad at himself, he only felt foolish to have had since such a long time those feelings inside of his heart, which were meant to be hurt and crushed at the end. Dan harus benar ia bahkan tidak marah pada dirinya sendiri, ia hanya merasa bodoh telah sejak begitu lama perasaan dalam hatinya, yang dimaksudkan untuk menjadi sakit dan hancur pada akhirnya. He didn't see a reason to be mad at Yoochun or Jaejoong, what kind of rights did he have to be so anyway ? Dia tidak melihat alasan untuk marah YooChun atau Jaejoong, apa hak dia harus begitu sih? And why should he ? Dan mengapa harus dia? He was the burden in that situation, now he only felt grateful to have kept his mouth shut and didn't obstruct Yoochun with some troublesome feelings like his. Dia adalah beban dalam situasi itu, sekarang ia hanya merasa bersyukur telah menutup mulutnya dan tidak menghalangi YooChun dengan perasaan bermasalah seperti itu.

Yeah, after all he had to be grateful... Yeah, setelah semua ia harus bersyukur ...
Life wasn't completly a bitch after all, what if he had confessed umh ? Hidup tidak completly jalang setelah semua, bagaimana kalau dia telah mengaku umh? It would have been even worser ! What if he had accepted? Junsu almost slapped his own face, that would have never happened and that never will. Itu akan lebih worser! Bagaimana jika ia telah menerima hampir? Junsu menampar wajah sendiri, yang tidak akan pernah terjadi dan yang tidak akan pernah. Now, he had to act differently, he had to stop to smile like an idiot, he had to stop to laugh so much or even to be so friendly, if he didn't want to get hurt some more, if he didn't want to put everyone in a troublesome situation he had to eradicate himself those feelings. Sekarang, ia harus bertindak berbeda, ia harus berhenti untuk tersenyum seperti orang idiot, dia harus berhenti untuk tertawa begitu banyak atau bahkan menjadi begitu ramah, jika ia tidak ingin terluka lagi, jika ia tidak ingin menempatkan setiap orang dalam situasi sulit ia harus membasmi dirinya sendiri perasaan itu.

“What are you thinking about ?” He jerked slightly at Yoochun's voice. "Apa yang kamu pikirkan tentang" Dia tersentak sedikit di suara Yoochun's?.

“Nothing why ?” "Tidak kenapa?"

“Because I've repeated the same sentence five times and you nodded all the way, so I ask you, what is wrong ?” "Karena aku mengulangi kalimat yang sama lima kali dan Anda mengangguk sepanjang jalan, jadi aku bertanya, apa yang salah?"

“...Well nothing really, just thinking about some disturbing stuff, let's continue” "... Yah tidak benar-benar, hanya berpikir tentang beberapa hal yang mengganggu, mari kita lanjutkan"

“Well it's the first time I see you so interested in your homeworks !” "Yah ini pertama kalinya saya melihat Anda begitu tertarik pada homeworks Anda!"

“After all that's why we're both here for, come one, let's stop talking unnecessarily now” "Setelah semua itu sebabnya kami berdua di sini, datang satu, mari kita berhenti bicara sia-sia sekarang"

“Crap I must be dreaming ! "Crap Aku harus bermimpi! Anyway, I'm glad of the appearance of the new Junsu, we'll finally be able to advance in our work now” Anyway, aku senang dari penampilan Junsu baru, kita akhirnya akan dapat maju dalam pekerjaan kami sekarang "

But in fact, Yoochun wasn't so pleased of the new Junsu. Namun pada kenyataannya, Yoochun tidak begitu senang dari Junsu baru. It's not like he wasn't happy to have a Junsu concentrated in his work and silent, but the fact was that he was too concentrated and way too silent. Ini tidak seperti ia tidak senang memiliki Junsu terkonsentrasi dalam karyanya dan diam, namun kenyataannya adalah bahwa dia terlalu terpusat dan terlalu diam.

And Yoochun wasn't used to that. Dan Yoochun tidak digunakan untuk itu. He just found it weird how the all lesson was all quiet, how Junsu was docilely doing the exercises he gave him and listening to his explanations carefully, but no longer joked or laughed or even smiled. Dia hanya merasa aneh bagaimana pelajaran semua itu semua tenang, bagaimana Junsu adalah patuh melakukan latihan ia memberinya dan mendengarkan penjelasan dengan hati-hati, tetapi tidak lagi bercanda atau tertawa atau bahkan tersenyum. And he didn't really like that. Dan ia tidak benar-benar seperti itu. But as he thought about it, he couldn't just stop to teach him and declare that he was doing too much of a serious job and that he wanted him to be less serious and laugh with him could he ? Tetapi karena dia berpikir tentang hal itu, dia tidak bisa hanya berhenti untuk mengajar dia dan menyatakan bahwa dia melakukan terlalu banyak pekerjaan serius dan bahwa ia ingin dia kurang serius dan tertawa dengan dia bisa dia?

He then realised that all this while, he never once asked Junsu to be quiet or to concentrate more on the lesson. Dia kemudian menyadari bahwa selama ini, ia tidak pernah meminta JunSu diam atau untuk lebih berkonsentrasi pada pelajaran. He never kept him from talking or laughing but always let him act as he wished. Dia tidak pernah membuatnya dari berbicara atau tertawa, tetapi selalu membiarkan dia bertindak sebagai dia berharap. Maybe because he liked his behaviour, he liked his smile and he liked to chat with him. Mungkin karena ia menyukai perilakunya, dia suka senyum dan dia suka chatting dengan dia. And Yoochun laughed slightly as he thought that he, the teacher, the one supposed to be serious, had enjoyed Junsu's carefree acts all the while and missed it now, to the point that he nearly closed the books in purpose to be able to find back the true Junsu. Dan YooChun tertawa sedikit saat ia berpikir bahwa ia, guru, yang seharusnya serius menikmati riang Junsu akan bertindak semua sementara dan tidak terjawab sekarang, sampai-sampai ia hampir menutup buku yang bertujuan untuk dapat menemukan kembali JunSu yang benar.

“What is so funny ?” He turned his head and noticed the person he thought of, staring at him dubiously. "Apa yang lucu" la berpaling dan melihat orang dia memikirkan, menatapnya ragu-ragu?.

“Nothing, just thinking” "Tidak ada, hanya berpikir"

“Well, you've been silent since several minutes now, it seems like I'm not the only one thinking am I ?” "Nah, kau sudah diam sejak beberapa menit sekarang, sepertinya aku bukan satu-satunya berpikir aku?"

Yoochun smiled “No you're not, but you were...” YooChun tersenyum "Tidak, kau tidak, tapi kau ..."

“Well let's get back to work now shall we ?” Yoochun's sentence had been quickly cut off, and the latter stared at the other with a surprised expression “I guess we must”. "Yah mari kita kembali bekerja sekarang akan kita?" Kalimat YooChun itu telah cepat memotong, dan terakhir menatap yang lain dengan ekspresi terkejut "Saya rasa kita harus".

The end of the lesson came really slowly but in the meantime so fast. Akhir pelajaran datang sangat lambat tapi sementara itu begitu cepat. Yoochun had not stopped to wish even for a second that Junsu will stop to act that way, he was getting pissed off, really. Yoochun tidak berhenti untuk berharap bahkan untuk satu detik yang Junsu akan berhenti untuk bertindak demikian, dia menjadi marah, benar-benar. He didn't understand his sudden change, and he kept to ask himself if he should just ask ? Dia tidak mengerti perubahan mendadak, dan ia terus bertanya pada dirinya sendiri kalau ia harus bertanya? After all, he, normally should be pleased that he became so serious, but the thing was that he definitively wasn't. Bagaimanapun, ia, biasanya harus senang bahwa ia menjadi sangat serius, tapi masalahnya adalah bahwa ia tidak definitif.

“Junsu, wait up please” He called before the other man had a chance to get his way out of the empty classroom. "JunSu, tunggu silakan" Dia menelepon sebelum orang lain memiliki kesempatan untuk mendapatkan jalan keluar dari ruang kelas kosong.

“Yes ?” "Ya?"

“How about me giving you more homework ?” "Bagaimana tentang saya memberikan PR lagi?"

“Okay” Now that was truly weird. "Oke" Sekarang yang benar-benar aneh.

“Don't misunderstand, it's not like I'm not happy about this sudden change of behaviour, but...Why are you acting all of a sudden so...seriously ?” "Jangan salah paham, bukan seperti saya tidak senang mengenai hal ini tiba-tiba berubah perilaku, tapi ... Mengapa kau bertindak tiba-tiba jadi ... serius?"

Junsu stayed quiet a moment before answering calmly and neatly “It is just that I realised there was no other meaning for us to lose time here than to work, in addition I am sure that if I get any more bad marks, teachers will kill me, and Changmin too, so you see there is not point to continue to act that childishly, I know I am here to work and I intend to” Junsu tetap tenang saat sebelum menjawab dengan tenang dan rapi "Itu hanya bahwa aku menyadari tidak ada arti lain bagi kita untuk kehilangan waktu di sini daripada untuk bekerja, di samping saya yakin bahwa jika aku mendapat nilai lebih buruk, guru akan membunuhku , dan Changmin juga, supaya kamu melihat tidak ada gunanya untuk terus tindakan yang kekanak-kanakan, aku tahu aku di sini untuk bekerja dan saya berniat untuk "

“I see...Well that is a change of mind, I thought you wanted to kill Shim Changmin because of those extra class lessons ?” "Saya melihat ... Yah yang merupakan perubahan pikiran, saya pikir Anda ingin membunuh Shim Changmin karena kelas pelajaran ekstra?"

“It was because of the shock, but I know he did it for me I am not that dumb you know” "Itu karena shock, tapi aku tahu dia melakukannya untuk saya, saya tidak bodoh kau tahu"

“I...never said anything like that” "I. .. pernah mengatakan hal seperti itu"

“I know, so, what are those homeworks you wanted to give me ?” "Aku tahu, jadi, apa yang mereka homeworks Anda ingin memberi saya?"

“No, I wasn't serious” "Tidak, aku tidak serius"

“...I see, so goodbye” "... Saya melihat, begitu selamat tinggal"

Yoochun frowned as Junsu left. YooChun mengerutkan kening sebagai Junsu kiri. What happened for the atmosphere to change that way ? Apa yang terjadi untuk atmosfer untuk mengubah cara itu? Whatever it was he hated it. Apa pun itu ia membencinya.

Yoochun had just finished to pack his things and was about to leave when he saw the door opening once again, he was surprised as Jeajoong entered in the room. Yoochun baru saja selesai berkemas barang-barangnya dan hendak pergi ketika ia melihat sekali lagi membuka pintu, dia terkejut sebagai Jeajoong dimasukkan dalam ruangan.

“I saw Junsu coming out, and he told me you were there” He explained. "Aku melihat Junsu keluar, dan dia bilang kau ada di sana" jelasnya. “Mind if you escort me somewhere ?” "Keberatan kalau kau menemaniku di suatu tempat?"

“Not at all, where do you want to go ?” "Tidak sama sekali, di mana Anda ingin pergi ke?"

“I don't know, and don't care really, it's your choice, only a place when...When one's able to calm down” "Saya tidak tahu, dan benar-benar tidak peduli, itu pilihan Anda, hanya tempat ketika ... Ketika seseorang bisa tenang"

By his look, and by his shaky voice, Yoochun instantly concluded that his state was due to Yunho. Dengan melihat, dan dengan suara gemetar nya, Yoochun langsung menyimpulkan bahwa negara adalah karena Yunho. But he didn't ask him further questions, he didn't try to lure him to talk. Tapi dia tidak menanyakan pertanyaan lebih lanjut, dia tidak mencoba untuk memancing dia untuk berbicara. He understood that if he didn't want to talk right now, the best he could do for him was just to stay by his side quietly. Dia mengerti bahwa jika ia tidak ingin bicara sekarang, yang terbaik yang bisa lakukan untuknya hanya untuk tetap di sampingnya diam-diam. And so he put on his coat and ended the conversation by a “let's go”. Maka ia mengenakan mantel dan mengakhiri percakapan dengan sebuah "mari kita pergi".




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I followed Yoochun without a word, I didn't know where we were going but that didn't matter I trusted him to bring me to the rightest place. Aku mengikuti Yoochun tanpa sepatah kata pun, aku tidak tahu di mana kami akan tetapi itu tidak masalah saya dipercaya dia untuk membawa saya ke tempat rightest. I just knew that Yoochun was able to understand me and it was relaxing, having someone to trust and to depend on, in this situation was really relaxing. Aku hanya tahu bahwa YooChun bisa memahami saya dan itu santai, memiliki seseorang untuk mempercayai dan bergantung pada, dalam situasi ini benar-benar bersantai.

And so, when we arrived at the planetarium I smiled, thinking that it was perfect. Jadi, ketika kami tiba di planetarium aku tersenyum, berpikir bahwa itu adalah sempurna. we slowly sat, and there, watching the artificial stars in that dark room, I didn't know why but it just made me want to cry. kita pelan-pelan duduk, dan di sana, mengamati bintang-bintang buatan di ruang gelap, aku tidak tahu mengapa tetapi hanya membuatku ingin menangis. It wasn't even out of saddeness no, if it were I would have felt pitiful, it was just out of exhaustion. Ini bahkan tidak keluar dari saddeness tidak, kalau itu saya akan merasa menyedihkan, itu hanya keluar dari kelelahan. I was exhausted, really, my relationship with Yunho, its end, the act I had to do everyday faking a relationship with Yoochun all of that let me energyless, I only felt so tired. Aku lelah, benar-benar, hubungan saya dengan Yunho, akhirnya, tindakan saya harus lakukan setiap hari berpura-pura hubungan dengan Yoochun semua yang membuatku energyless, saya hanya merasa sangat lelah.

I closed my eyes. Aku memejamkan mata. And there it came, images of Yunho and me, I really did not want to admit it, I really did not. Dan itu datang, gambar Yunho dan aku, aku benar-benar tidak mau mengakuinya, aku benar-benar tidak. But, it had been a while by now that those memories where occuring to me, it had been a while since I started to think about it again, out of my free will. Tapi, itu sudah lama sekali sekarang bahwa orang-kenangan di mana terjadi kepada saya, sudah lama aku mulai berpikir tentang hal itu lagi, dari kehendak bebas saya.

And I didn't feel proud about it, far from that. Dan aku tidak merasa bangga tentang hal itu, jauh dari itu. I felt shameful, completly shameful. Aku merasa memalukan, completly memalukan.
Now I hated myself for that. Sekarang aku membenci diriku untuk itu. I had wished to run away from it, but I just couldn't. Aku ingin lari dari itu, tapi aku tidak bisa. Images, scents, flavours of that time I spent with Yunho kept to force their way into my mind. Foto, aroma, rasa itu waktu saya habiskan bersama Yunho terus memaksa jalan mereka ke dalam pikiran saya. But if it were only that, it wouldn't have touched me so deeply, no, there was more, what brought shame on me was that I seeked it. Tetapi jika hanya itu, tidak akan menyentuh saya begitu dalam, tidak, masih ada lagi, apa yang membawa malu pada saya adalah bahwa saya menempuh jalur itu. I wanted to recall all of this. Aku ingin mengingat semua ini.

I had successfully gotten myself away from him, but now I found myself wishing from his touch, and being such a paradoxe I knew I feared it too. Aku telah berhasil mendapatkan diriku darinya, tapi sekarang aku mendapati diriku berharap dari sentuhan, dan menjadi seperti paradoxe yang aku kenal aku takut juga.
It was driving me insane, this desire which burnt in me and made my blood race, I had spent countless hours trying to end that relationship and when I did all I could think of was the past. Itu membuatku gila, ini keinginan yang dibakar di dalam Aku dan membuat darah ras, saya telah menghabiskan banyak waktu mencoba untuk mengakhiri hubungan itu dan ketika saya melakukan semua aku bisa memikirkan masa lalu. All I could think of was how he used to touch me, to kiss me, how I used to feel my body heat increase as his skin touched mine, how all I could think of was him. Aku hanya bisa memikirkan bagaimana ia digunakan untuk menyentuhku, menciumku, bagaimana aku digunakan untuk merasakan tubuh saya panas meningkat tambang menyentuh kulitnya, bagaimana aku bisa memikirkan dia.

It was crazy how much of him still remained in my soul, but I didn't want to make him disappear, I just could not get myself to give it up. Itu gila berapa banyak dia masih tetap dalam jiwaku, tapi aku tidak ingin membuatnya menghilang, aku tidak bisa membuat diriku untuk menyerah. I couldn't erase those memories, I didn't want to. Aku tidak bisa menghapus kenangan, aku tidak ingin. I knew I should have I knew it wasn't right, but I was not able to. Aku tahu aku seharusnya aku tahu itu tidak benar, tapi aku tidak bisa.
Goosebumps could be seen on my skin as I only thought of his hands tracing my body, of his tongue, of the heat of his body over mine, and I didn't want to realise it, how I missed it. Goosebumps bisa dilihat pada kulit saat aku hanya memikirkan tangannya menelusuri tubuhku, lidahnya, dari panas tubuh di atas tambang, dan aku tidak ingin menyadarinya, bagaimana saya melewatkannya. I didn't miss all the pain I've been through. Aku tidak kehilangan semua rasa sakit yang telah kualami. I didn't regret ending that relationship, I knew that otherwise I would have certainely broken down. Aku tidak menyesal mengakhiri hubungan, aku tahu bahwa kalau tidak aku akan certainely rusak.

But, that strange nostalgie, I couldn't do anything about it. Tapi, itu Nostalgie aneh, aku tidak bisa berbuat apa-apa. I could not just ignore those thoughts, or erase my memory, what happened had happened and now it was haunting me, and I should have known it was going to be that way, I just didn't expect it to be that hard. Aku tidak bisa begitu saja mengabaikan pikiran-pikiran, atau menghapus memori saya, apa yang terjadi telah terjadi dan sekarang sudah menghantui saya, dan seharusnya aku tahu itu akan seperti itu, aku hanya tidak berharap ia akan menjadi sulit. I didn't expect that keeping myself away from Yunho physically was going to make the thoughts of him even more vehement in my mind. Saya tidak berharap bahwa menjaga diri dari Yunho secara fisik akan membuat pikiran bahkan lebih keras dalam pikiran saya.

I sighed, and opened up my eyes, but they only met darkness, Yoochun's hand was covering them. Aku mendesah, dan membuka mata saya, tapi mereka hanya bertemu kegelapan, tangan YooChun itu meliputi mereka.

“Yoochun...” And then it came, his lips on mine. "Yoochun ..." Dan kemudian datang, bibirnya di bibirku.

My mind was blank for a moment, before tons of questions fell down on me, What the hell was that ? Pikiranku kosong sejenak, sebelum ton pertanyaan jatuh pada saya, Apa itu? Did he want to play with me like Yunho did ? Apakah dia ingin bermain dengan saya seperti Yunho lakukan? But he was not that kind of person, so what ? Tapi ia bukan orang semacam itu, jadi apa? Why would he do something like this ? Kenapa dia melakukan sesuatu seperti ini? Did he...Did he care for me ? Apakah dia ... Apakah dia peduli padaku?

I stared at him too dumbfounded to even talk, but he wouldn't look at me, his eyes were glued on the floor. Aku menatapnya tercengang bahkan juga bicara, tapi ia tidak akan melihat saya, matanya terpaku di lantai.

“I...I wanted to tell you, I really did, but I felt that you wouldn't have accepted my proposition, and, you have to understand that I really wanted to help you out, I never ever thought of taking advantage of you, but you see, watching you that sad I could not stand it” "I. .. aku ingin mengatakan, aku benar-benar, tapi aku merasa bahwa Anda tidak akan menerima proposisi saya, dan, Anda harus mengerti bahwa aku benar-benar ingin membantu Anda keluar, saya tidak pernah memikirkan memanfaatkan dari Anda, tetapi Anda melihat, menyaksikan bahwa sedih aku tidak bisa tahan "

Did he...Did he have those feeling all along ? Apakah ia ... Apakah ia memiliki perasaan yang selama ini? If it's true what I did to him was just awful. Jika memang benar apa yang saya lakukan kepadanya hanya mengerikan. I took advantage of his kindness. Aku memanfaatkan kebaikannya.

“I am really sorry Yoochun, I'm so insensitive that I didn't notice your feelings” "Saya sangat menyesal Yoochun, aku sangat sensitif bahwa aku tidak memperhatikan perasaan Anda"

“Don't say that, I still want to pretend, I still want to help you” "Jangan berkata begitu, Aku masih ingin berpura-pura, Aku masih ingin membantu Anda"

“No, I don't want to take advantage of you some more, I know too well how it feels, and you have to understand that I care too much for you as a friend to do such a thing, thank you for everything” "Tidak, saya tidak ingin mengambil keuntungan dari Anda lagi, aku tahu benar bagaimana rasanya, dan Anda harus mengerti bahwa aku terlalu peduli untuk Anda sebagai teman untuk melakukan hal seperti itu, terima kasih untuk segalanya"




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I didn't run away this time, I calmly went out, and since the rain was falling so hard, I walked to the nearest bus stop. Aku tidak melarikan diri kali ini, aku tenang pergi keluar, dan karena hujan turun begitu keras, aku berjalan ke halte bus terdekat.
I only realised after he kissed me, what was a kiss without my love and a kiss with, I realised after he kissed me that despite Yunho did not share the same feelings, that could not change the fact that I loved him. Aku hanya sadar setelah dia menciumku, apa yang ciuman tanpa cinta dan ciuman dengan, aku sadar setelah dia menciumku bahwa meskipun Yunho tidak berbagi perasaan yang sama, yang tidak bisa mengubah fakta bahwa aku mencintainya.

I absently entered in the bus, letting my head fall on the window, watching the blurry sight, that street, I knew it. Aku tanpa sadar masuk dalam bus, membiarkan jatuh kepala di jendela, menonton pemandangan kabur, bahwa jalan, aku tahu itu. If I stopped there, I would be so close to Yunho's place, so close... Jika aku berhenti di sana, aku akan sangat dekat dengan tempat Yunho, jadi dekat ...
I didn't know what had gotten into me but suddenly I stood up and pushed the button for the automatic door to open. Aku tidak tahu apa yang masuk ke saya, tapi tiba-tiba aku berdiri dan menekan tombol untuk membuka pintu otomatis.

And there, I saw him . Dan sana, aku melihatnya. I couldn't believe it at first, but his back, I knew it too well to mistake it with an other one. Aku tak bisa percaya pada awalnya, tetapi punggungnya, aku tahu itu terlalu baik untuk kesalahan itu dengan yang lain. Things like why he was walking here or why he didn't have an umbrella did no matter to me, all I knew was that my legs ran helplessly towards him. Hal-hal seperti mengapa dia berjalan di sini atau mengapa ia tidak memiliki payung tidak peduli padaku, yang saya tahu adalah bahwa kaki saya berlari tak berdaya ke arahnya.

He turned around at the noise of my feet on the cold sidewalk, and with no further ado his arms drawn my body toward him while my own closed tightly around his chest. Dia berbalik pada suara kakiku di trotoar dingin, dan tanpa basa-basi lagi lengannya ditarik tubuhku ke arahnya sementara saya sendiri tertutup erat di dadanya. Fingers where grabbing each other's shirts, the rain was pourring but we couldn't care less, my hand crept slowly on his back until it found his drenched hair and pushed his head so that our mouths will collid. Fingers mana menyambar kemeja masing-masing, hujan pourring tapi kami tidak peduli, tangan saya merayap perlahan-lahan di punggungnya sampai menemukan rambut basah kuyup dan mendorong kepalanya sehingga mulut kita akan collid.

We kissed under the rain. Kami berciuman di bawah hujan. All I could feel now was the wetness envelloping me more and more and his lips kissing me with a passion I knew so well. Aku bisa merasakan sekarang adalah basah envelloping saya lebih dan lebih dan bibirnya mencium saya dengan semangat yang saya tahu dengan sangat baik.
Our tongues came in contact almost instantly as if the time we spent away from each other only served to arouse the desire we felt some more. lidah kami datang di kontak hampir seketika saat jika waktu kami menghabiskan jauh dari satu sama lain hanya melayani untuk membangkitkan keinginan kita merasa lagi.

We broke apart, but our lips remained close, the feeling of hotness of each other's breaths in that cold weather, had something strangely entracing and arousing. Kami berpisah, tapi bibir kita tetap dekat, rasa panas dari napas masing-masing dalam cuaca dingin, ada sesuatu yang aneh entracing dan membangkitkan. He took my hand into his, and without any words we started to walk, I knew where we were heading to and I squeezed his hand some more. Dia meraih tanganku ke dalam nya, dan tanpa kata-kata kita mulai berjalan, aku tahu di mana kami menuju dan aku meremas tangannya lagi.

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